The Zen Master and the Yogi

The Zen Master AND THE Yogi in my ongoing interest in deepening my understanding of the awakened condition, I have taken every opportunity to meet spiritual teachers from different traditions. This has been and continues to be a fascinating and educational experience. It is far too easy to assume that we have come farther than we actually have if we are not willing to test the depth and validity of our own conclusions. It is only through making the effort to seek out the company of those who seem to have the same depth of interest in liberation of the human spirit as we do, that we will be given the opportunity to test our own knowledge and find out if there are any limitations in our own view So often teacher and student alike too easily become self-satisfied and over- confident in the belief that their path and their way is perfect and beyond question. The spiritual path is the search for and discovery of total insecurity. More often than not, it becomes the very opposite of that. The validity of any teacher, path or system can only The Zen Master and (he 'io^i ultimately be determined by their results. The result, rather than I he promise, is what I have always been interested in. Often what can seem to he a perfect teacher, teaching or tradition can, when scrutinized more closely, be discovered to be far from that. If one peers deeply into the human condition when faced with the highest possibility of perfect liberation, one tends to find more questions than answers. Two years into my teaching career, a man in his early fifties who had been on the spiritual path for more than half his life came to see me. I was particularly intrigued when he told me that he had been a student of a renowned Zen master under whose tutelage he had participated in fifty sesshins. Having done some Buddhist practice myself, 1 had heard much about the strength of will and stamina necessary to do these arduous meditation retreats. They were, it seemed, the most rigorous and demanding form of intensive practice that one could do. I was interested in this mans experience not only because of how much practice he had done, but also because 1 had heard so much about the Zen master under whose guidance he had studied. A teacher of tremendous energy, he was known For tirelessly traversing the planet, teaching one sesshin ahcr another. had heard from others who had done scssiiins wiih hi in ihal he was a very demanding teacher while al ihe same lime very compassionate. When se\eial \ears later the man An I ^mondUumid RchiUonship (o lijc who had come to see me, now my student, had offered to arrange a meeting with the Roshi, I was thrilled. He was reputed to be the greatest living Zen master in America. On a beautiful fall day I went with three of my students to meet him at his retreat center in the desert outside of Los Angeles. When

first saw him, 1 was struck by his beautiful face and the strength and power that seemed to emanate from his extremely small body. His serenity and quiet confidence were the unmistakable mark of one who has found himself and who is no longer afraid of life. 1 began our meeting by saying that 1 was amazed by how much confusion and corruption there was in the modern spiritual world. He seemed surprised by this and responded by saying that if dismay was the basis of my teaching then there was ego. I said that the basis of my teaching was love. 1 remember at the time not under- standing his point, but thought to myself that eventually it would become clear to me. Later I went on to describe the foundation of my teaching. 1 said if one wanted to be free, it was imperative that one find a way to take no position in relationship to all thought, feeling and experience. At the same time, I went on to say, one must come to terms with the paradoxical fact that as we are human beings and we have to act, we can't avoid taking a position in rela- tionship to thought, feeling and experience. He liked what 1 said, but stated that this shouldn't be only intellectual. said my understanding was the result of the investigation The Zen Mask"? and the YiXi of love. "Good," he said. "To have a following, one must be a iruc lover and be able to show that the Source is the same Source of student, teacher and ant." There was a warm feeling between us and the atmos- phere was one of respect and seriousness. We spent over an hour together with several of my own students and his in attendance. When I spoke about the passion

felt burning inside me to awaken others and about the revolutionary implications of enlightenment, he said he supported me, but cautioned me not to be too flurried in my passion. He told me that some will agree with me and some will not, but all are my friends. He impressed me more by his pres- ence and unusually natural condition than by what he said. Often the communication was difficult because not only were we speaking through a translator, but also many of his responses took the form of Zen aphorisms, some of which I found difficult to understand. In the car on the way back to Los Angeles, the translator, an American who had been a longtime student of the Roshi, explained to us in great depth and detail his understanding of the Roshis teaching, which made it even more apparent that he was a man of high attainment. Pleased by our meet- ing, I looked forward to the opportunity of speaking with the Roshi a second time in greater depth. 1 thought about w hat the Roshi had said to me, that my dismay at tlic modern spw- itual predicament could be a sign of ego. I thought aKuii liiis deeply and always found nnself unable io lUKJersiaiKl w hat An lUuonditional Rclalionship to life he was getting at. My confusion about this matter deepened even more several months later when one of my students spoke to his chief disciple in Vienna about our meeting. Apparently when his disciple asked the Roshi what he had thought of me, he responded by saying he thought 1 was crazy. 1 was perplexed as this seemed like an extreme response to what appeared to have been a respectful and warm exchange. I wondered about what it was that 1 could have said or done that would cause such a response from one who seemed to have gone so far. Several months later while 1 was teaching in New York City, 1 found out. A man who came to hear me speak had read an article written by the student who had introduced me to the Roshi. He said that the article which described the Roshi as a man of integrity had, it seemed, portrayed him very inaccurately. He went on to say that a close friend of his had been sexually abused by the Roshi during a private interview at a sesshin. Apparently she had been so disturbed by this event that it took her several years to recover. Since that time, more stories about other escapades of the Roshi reached me. So it was not then difficult to understand why the Roshi cautioned me about my passion and felt that my objection to corruption was the expression of ego. When I was teaching in Santa Fe, New Mexico 1 noticed that a western man with a long beard who was wearing a white turban was listening to me with rapt attention. At the The Zen Master and the Yo^ end ol I he evening, he asked to speak with me privately. Later when we spoke, he told me he was one of the chief disciples of a famous Indian yogi who had a large commu- nity of followers in America and in Europe. I had heard a lot about his guru over the years as he was quite famous. He was a Sikh and all of his western devotees also became Sikhs when they joined his community. Both men and women wore turbans and dressed in white. He had many centers where a rigorous form of yoga and pranayama were taught. His disciple told me that he had been the head of one of his gurus ashrams for many years. He said he very much liked my teaching and then invited me to meet his guru. The following day, 1 went to meet him with four of my students. As we approached his residence, we had to stop at the gate where a female armed guard sat in a small room w^ith four windows. As we entered, we were warmly greet- ed by his disciple who had invited us, along with another disciple who welcomed us with equal warmth. I noticed that both shook my hand with the same strength and assurance. As we walked toward their gurus residence, we passed his fleet of cars which included a Rolls Royce and two Lincoln Continentals that were lined up side by side Upon entering his house, we were welcomed by severa turbaned women and the enticing smell of Indian fooc being prepared for our lunch. His discij')le led my sludenis and me into the living room where he inlroduccd nic [o hi guru. He was a large man whose o\er\\ eight hocl\ was An ['moudidoniil Rchilu^nship to Life draped over a reclining chair, his legs extended in front of him supported by a footrest. Immediately he said, "Now that he's come, we will stop speaking about business and will speak only about spiritual matters." 1 sat in the chair opposite him. It was obvious that he was a very powerful man as he effortlessly commanded the attention of all those around him. As we spoke he looked at me very directly while continuously doing different things with his hands, one minute stroking his long grey beard, another rustling through papers on a small side table next to his chair. Many of the women who had been work- ing in the kitchen came in and sat down. One of them, a middle-aged Indian woman, was his wife. In a short time the atmosphere became quite charged with intensity and a current seemed to fill the room. Soon after we started speaking, 1 described to him how I stressed to my students the necessity of being deadly seri- ous about spiritual life, and went on to speak about the confused state of affairs in the modern spiritual world. said that it was important in the time we are living in that some be willing to set a standard. He responded by saying that everyone goes their own way, and then spoke about the role of karma and destiny. At one point he laughed and said I was too idealistic. "It is a very dangerous thing to be an example for others," he said. "One who is doing so is setting themselves up for a fall." I went on to describe how the example that many teachers were setting was creating The Zen Master and the Yo^ an enormous aniouiil of cynicism and douhi aboui ihc possibility of purity at a time when it was so sorely needed. He made no bones about the fad that he disagreed with me about this. "In this, I have no choice,"

said. To my surprise, he smiled and said, "Yes, I know you have no choice. I can see this is your destiny." Then he turned to his disciples and said, "Look, even when he's being challenged his aura doesn't change." He seemed pleased and we both smiled. He went on to tell me many stories about himself, about his early life and struggles, and also spoke about one of his teachers. He didn't appear to me to be a man who was enlightened, but at the same time he was undoubtedly very powerful and seemed to possess psychic abilities. At one point, he got a long distance phone call and paused to take care of some business dealings. Then he spoke for a long time, like many Indian teachers do, in a rambling way— one moment quoting scripture, the next telling a story and then speaking in metaphor. In spite of the fact that we obviously disagreed on many fundamental points, the tone of our meeting always remained one of friendship and respect. Although

felt he was a man whom il might be dangerous to trust, he appeared to be sweet and caring. His disciples' love and devotion to him was extraordinary. We were treated to a sumptuous blend oi Indian and Mexican food. After we ate, he made predictions about in\ An I Unconditional Relationship to Life future, saying I would be a successful and influential teacher with many students. Then he took a pencil and paper and spent several minutes scribbling numbers. He was an expert on astrology and numerology He said that my first seven years of teaching were going to be the most difficult and that in one year my hardest times would be over. He spoke to me in a fatherly way and said more than once that 1 must be protected at all times, even to the degree that when travel five men should surround me "like a sandwich." He also said that 1 travel too much and that it was traveling that had ruined his own body. When he found out my wife was Indian and also from a Sikh background, he and his wife both insisted that she come for lunch the following day. When we left, his disciple walked us to our car. After thanked him, he looked at me with intense sincerity and said, "Guruji likes you very much and he wanted you to know that if there is anything, anything at all he can do to help you, don't hesitate to ask." As we drove past the armed guard at the gate, 1 couldn't help but wonder what he meant. The Zen Master and the Yogi