Apoorva and Max: Conversations from the Heart - Honouring Andrew Cohen through our Stories

Welcome to conversations from the heart honoring Andrew Cohen through our stories. My name is Daniela Bomater. I was a student of Andrews for 17 years and for the past nine years I had the privilege of living and working alongside him. This service is a tribute to his life, his teaching, and the evolutionary fire he sparked in so many of us. Through these intimate conversations, we remember not only the man, but the depths of transformation he catalyzed in our lives. May these stories keep his legacy alive, honoring the sacred thread that connects us and allowing his voice to continue resonating through ours. So welcome, welcome Max, welcome Apurva. Hello to this conversations from the heart about our relationship to Andrew Cohen. And uh it's interesting today I two hours ago I had a conversation with a former student of Andrew that met him in the first year like 39 years ago. uh and uh was was with him for a long long time. And then I was thinking the two of you are are an expression of the the youngest students. Yeah. You you met him in the Yeah. You you can say it yourself when but uh in the last 10 years when he started to teach again after the crash of enlightened next. So that's very interesting also to as a contrast and and uh yeah it's good to have this conversation with you. So the way I always start is to just ask you where did you meet Andrew? How did you meet Andrew? And what made you stick with him and and follow his teaching and come to retreats? And what what was it in the connection to Andrew that uh struck you if there was anything like this? You want to start? Yeah, sure. Yeah. Thank you, ma'am. Thank you for uh having us here. And uh the first time I met uh sir as I call him uh yeah so I met him at uh 2019 um at a retreat in pyramid valley uh where there was like this u 4-day retreat a spiritual science program like what that was going on and uh so you know I I met various kind of spiritual teachers there but then uh when it came to uh the talk on evolutionary enlighten ment given by sir. He was just sitting there on a chair all by himself and uh he delivered for the first time in me like it sparked a an evolutionary like you know fire like something I I could recognize something in me which I always wanted like this is what I was looking for in a spiritual teacher like you know it was like an immediate connection and like a it was it it I could I can explain it as a feeling of like a fire that's what comes to me it was like it aliveness the teaching the aliveness in the teaching and the invitation to wake up to the evolutionary impulse itself. So that was very new for me coming from India where it's usually a practice of surrender and letting go. So this was the teaching first time I heard where it was giving me the agency to participate in the evolution of consciousness. So that was very attractive for me. And after that I started attending the uh satsang we used to have at his apartment in Bangalore. And for me like I would just wait at that point I was practicing uh you know at dentistry and I would be moving from clinic to clinic and my work would be busy keep me busy but I would wait for that one hour everywhere like my focus was just okay that that one hour where I'm looking forward all of a sudden like there was a shift in my life so where I was just like okay I'm waiting for that one hour and it would excite me and that one hour would be like a beautiful exploration we would have together about the nature of consciousness which is something I had never been a part of or experienced. So that was very captivating for me and after that I became a student and a resident and it was also the interubjective dialogue which was very new and it was it's like an application of what you know we are learning otherwise just in theory. So yeah, let's talk more later probably about the interubjective dialogue. I think that's a very important part of of the last years and of all the years. But but for us, I think it was a very very important practice. But uh Max, you could probably share your story and then we go more into into other aspects. I heard about Andrew years ago. I heard about him as a very uncompromising, very demanding teacher and uh I was involved with another very powerful awakening teacher. And then somehow our destiny was that our passes separated and um 3 years ago I shifted into Malai uh and I was looking for the teacher because I don't know maybe some other people can but I I definitely I knew that I need somebody to guide me to I need a teacher. Yeah. So, and the Tijuana Mala is like a spiritual Disneyland. Lots of things are possible here. And it took me one year to actually I remember this day. I was riding my scooter around the Aronachala. It was a very sunny, very good day. And suddenly I got this thought, huh? I wonder where is Andrew Coin lives. I remembered that that moment and like a five minutes later I came to my home and my companion said me Max look I saw the poster Andrew coin town and I was wow that's yeah and when I met him for the first time when I came for his meeting I was expecting to meet somebody intimidating actually and I was surprised to to see very sweet, intelligent, very soft man and yeah from the first meeting I something something happened something shifted in me and then I was trying to participate every meeting every possibility to meet him that was in 2022 yeah when you when you came to the south 2023 January January 23. Oh, okay. Yeah. Wow. Two years. Two years. We have a story for two years. Yeah. Yeah. But it was a profound story, wasn't it? Yeah. That's Yeah. Something special. Yeah. So when you I would like to go a little bit into how you how you perceived Andrew. You you described it already beautifully like but what was it? What was the attraction of Andrew? What what was it that was so magnetic that that uh I think we all felt it that that wanted us to be with him with his teaching and and grow. Like I always felt like one of one of his skills or or part of his transmission was that he made us want to grow and develop and and sit up straight and and uh try to be our best selves. No, he was an example. Uh first of all he his energy is is something enormous something which you really can feel when you meet him. It's like a you sit in the room and it's it's like a feeling the mountain come inside you know and um his way of teaching his when he preach he became like a becomes like a fourstory buildings like a creature like a very strong energy. It's a it's smash all the doubts. It's like direct direct going direct inside. Mhm. And in the same time he's he has such a sense of humor, such a easy way to explain. Yeah, it's beautiful. Yeah. And then he's he's very different from others who I met on in my life because he's his approach is very different and um first of all it's very clear it's very clear teaching very kind of complete teaching which I I liked it very much and um Yes. And and the energy it goes together with the energy. Mhm. What what was it in the teaching that that both of you felt felt so attractive? Of course, you pointed to the evolutionary part. Yeah. Like that that we actually can participate in evolution. What else was it that that made his or still makes his teaching so powerful? For me, it was the precision like it was just like it the way he used his words to describe the indescribable. So that was very powerful because I had never seen anyone do that before and that was definitely like an evolved part of the consciousness doing that for us. So it came through him and uh that was very captivating and for yeah I mean I never expected I would stumble upon a guru but then he became a guru figure and he he he he was just so consistent because I have also attended uh you know because we we had just started the online uh satsang and there were days where we would just have six of us or four of hours or you know seven of us in the online satsang but there was there was that just that equal dedication every time he came he showed up as that what he was teaching so that was that was something I've you know it was uh undeniable like you it's it was magnetic it was so attractive and you just want to give into that and his care for the evolution of consciousness uh and um the way he would engage with us and even in the dialogue part of it uh right like he would just he with so much care he would answer every one of us the way we had to hear it also because there are times in these six years I've asked him the same questions over and over and over again and exactly for me also I have just seen the patient kind loving side of him and uh it was just a beautiful relationship I had with him because it transformed something in me and like you said it's it's consciousness recognizing itself you know it's it was something in me recognizing in him and that was something that really connected us I feel because he pointed at to the real thing itself like Yeah. Yeah. Um may I frankly speaking I was a bit addicted to the states which uh which possible to so to say get on the satsang and um yeah and somehow he found a way to explain to show me that it it it doesn't matter how many thoughts I have. It doesn't matter what the mood was, what's was it good day or bad day. The enlightenment, the freedom is a is a position which I can take any moment. It's a it's a position. It's a it's a position where I let go of my mind. Staying vigilant, let go of my mind. And uh it's a conscious choice. It's it it it made everything very different. It turned everything kind of the perspective of it. It's such a I mean it's such a gift from him. He found this this just to show me what is possible not to be depending on on the on the states not looking for the not you know but to make a conscious choice every time. Yeah. So for me it was also the fight and it's the I mean that became like my mantra every day like you know I would just like choose your freedom face everything you know it was just take responsibility I have I don't know any other mantras but this really really set a different kind of momentum in myself in in and and the beautiful sa also like that was also very attractive the beautiful people part of the sana So I felt like it was it was like this momentum that was being created generated through all of us through the teachings and also something which just kept me going and coming more and more and get going deeper into the the teachings and yeah yeah yeah that makes a lot of sense and I often think like in the last 10 years since Andrew was teaching again we were all highly benefiting from all the learning things from the earlier times and from everything that everybody went through. And we we were we were standing on on giants also on we were also standing on the experience of a SA that that already was in this experiment and was close to Andrew and and there were difficulties and and therefore at one point it crumbled. I felt like we had the opportunity to to do it all over again with with an Andrew that had learned so much from all the experiences and at the same time hasn't lost anything of his power of transmission and of as you both described the the precision and and the simplicity of the teachings that were still so mindblowing. And uh I wanted to ask you awa and probably also Max uh I'm I'm not sure but with Apurwa I'm sure uh Andrew was very interested in cultural conditionings also. Yeah. So can you talk a little bit about what what it helped you and the teaching helped you to kind of uh break out of of your Indian structure or Yeah. structures. One can say that. Yeah. And and I know Yeah. I know you you already broke out before you met Andrew, but Andrew probably helped you to see some of these things better and and be able to to take it forward. Yeah. Oh yes. I mean total credit goes to him because when I met him in 2019, I had uh just come out of my rigid family structure here. Uh so and then after that I a few months later I just one day like I think Max was it was also serendipitous manner like I just felt this need to take my phone and just see and then I went to the retreat and I met him and he after that like you know the teachings really helped me come out of my u I think this yeah my imagination of what enlightenment is personally uh and through it. It made it a very real experience like it he gave me the he gave me this his teachings gave me the agency to be an agent in my own life and he beautifully also brought in the integral you know part of it and he explained the different structure stages of evolution. So that was also very that way the teaching was just so whole cuz it explained to me very detailedly what is a positive ego, what is a negative ego, what is the authentic self and what is the evolutionary. So I could see all these various discern these various parts in me and as I did that and his just the teachings of meditation to pay attention and let go or it could be in the becoming to pay attention and respond. They were very simple teachings but when you actually practice them they they work in a very beautiful way where it naturally leads to your evolution also in these different structures you're a part of and the condition I was you know attuned to so it could help it it just beautifully brought me out of that and it's it was including all of that it was again not like saying you know excluding them it was including them And it was that beautiful thing where he describes it as from the wrong relationship to zero. And then he helped you go into that freedom, the states of nothingness. And then he really really helped us even have the right relationship to everything around us. And that beautifully helped me evolve. It could be in my work. Uh it could be in my family. like I could just put things to the right place and evolve from my and in the retreat the last retreat we had in 2025 this was the first time I had been a part of uh even the becoming part of the retreat uh where we had the intersubjective dialogue so yes that was a big part of the teaching which really really helped me again break out of these structure stages the conditionings that were very very strongly ingrained in like saying India because in India until then it was like I was a spirit I was I had various uh you know gurus some not in the form so it was all about I would experience these absolute states but it was more in the form of surrender every time I surrender and then there's something that comes out of that but with sir it was the first time I I could experience that opposite of that where you take the complete responsibility for what's happening around you and that I think the teachings itself when you practice it, it beautifully helps you evolve. Yeah. Yeah. That's beautifully described. Yeah. I would like to say a couple of words. So this culture conditioning it's a it's a very strong in in need. Yeah. on people on me and um you are Ukrainian. Just so that the people who listen to this, you know, Ukrainian being Eastern Europe, you you need to be tough to to to Yeah. to survive. And uh yeah, I mentioned that Andre has a very good sense of humor. So, and we established very good connection from the very beginning. And um yeah, some sometimes he he was making a joke about my kind of Western Europe conditioning and uh yeah, and I was able also to to to laugh about it with him. And now I can see I sometimes I'm I'm laughing the way I'm the way I behave, the way I I talk. It's Yes. I what to say? I I would say I'm more soft now. Yeah. Yeah. He was excellent in in pointing to these cultural conditionings though. And sometimes it was a little we kind of contract a little bit and feel like ah no I'm not that Swiss but then you realize oh yeah I actually am. Yes. Yeah. And and the SA we we have here Yes. It's so international. It's so worldwide and um in front of other people from different countries from different different culture you can easily see your things. It's like it's very funny how it works. It's like everybody has something and then you can see your things. Mhm. Yeah. And I I also just realized that uh with the two of you or the three of us because our SA is still very very small, we also were blessed with having a relationship with Andrew that that was a mix between personal and impersonal or with the guru and or and and with the with the man the human being. Andrew like he wasn't he wasn't remote somewhere on the pedestal in and uh we the three of us were very close to him at times and and had a lot of meals together and a lot of fun and a lot of listening to music or or making jokes or talking about politics. And I find that very interesting to mention also because I do think that we were piloting a new kind of guru guru disciple relationship uh in in this new incarnation uh with him when he started to teach again and I had a lot of conversations with him about that but I know that the two of you for sure experienced that too that it was a very multi-dimensional relationship that we could have with him. And this was very beautiful and it also meant a lot and I wonder what you think about that for ourselves like to to distinguish whe when the guru was talking like seriously pointing to something that that we had to kind of stop in our tracks and and let in and and and see because he wanted us to see it. and and when there was space for for the chokes and the fun and the and the just the casual being together and I I found that a very very interesting mix and and at times also challenging to find the right balance. No. Yes. He he's such a man that it's naturally you you respect him. Yeah. And naturally he's a bit a bit here but the energy and so we shared lots of uh informal conversation lunches and so on. I was invited to his house and I mean and this makes a difference. It's it's like you can see how guru behaves in the in the regular life. How how he's talk, how he's joking, how he's doing things. And that's what I like actually. That's that's a big part of a teaching just to watch watch him how he's moving how he's I don't know eating talking and in the same time yeah I respect him very much and yeah it's it's it's it never was a conflict or I hope I ever. I [Music] mean, yeah, he's But it works together. The It works very much together. When he preach, when he talks, it's it's the natural response. It sit and hear and kind of absorb it. Mhm. And um when he behaved informally, it's very easy to to be part of his company. Yeah. He never put himself especially like a I am here, you're here. It's never was like this. But naturally, it was this shift shift like a play. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think likewise for me also I never had an issue uh with the guru position and the you know informal part of it. It was there was a beautiful flow to it like you know when we were in the in the satsang or in the teachings it was just like this okay I need to give my all attention no questioning that position because there was complete trust this beautiful trust that developed over these six years for me and you know it was beautiful because every time I had an experience he would just be like yes that is it. So you know when he pointed that or when he like so uh lovingly invited or was that bridge for us to take that leap of faith when I saw him do all of these with so much vulnerability and strength and you know for the sake of the whole basically I could just feel that and all I wanted to do is give into that completely no questions asked and then there was this because it was beautiful what how it built over these six years, every every meeting. And yes, the informal part was fun because we used to discuss about everything from politics to music to food. Uh a lot of food and uh at that point he would let me also take the hierarchy wherever you know I think I knew more so he would also allow me to and listen to me and respond. So I mean it was just a beautiful uh dialogue or a flow we had between these guru position and the friend or the father. So I mean for it was beautiful. Yeah. Yeah it really was. I I think essential components it's I mean the love of course the love I I can see people love him but the love is is is not enough. I I think it's this this trust and this respect that's that's what is very important for me to to trust and to be trustworthy to feel kind of he can trust me also. M that makes everything such a such easiness such a natural melting it. M love is beautiful but trust and respect it's like yeah it it's very interesting when I listen to you I realize again something that I'm thinking a lot about I think in our small song over the last six eight nine years we really were able to create a structure and and not official structure but a structure in consciousness that was a was a a true expression of what Andrew called natural hierarchy and everything that you're describing actually speaks to that it the the my feeling is like like like a vortex that came together between all the these students of Andrews that had different years of experience, different depths of engaging with the teaching and Andrew Andrew as as the teacher, as the guru holding it all together. And it had such a natural aliveness and verticality and beauty and truth and and trust. It it's almost like a lot of what what he always envisioned was actually starting to manifest in our in our song in a very natural way and with without all the all the negatives and the pressure that had been present uh before the crash. It I really feel we were able to restart something. He was able to restart something with all the learnings in it and and still with with the power uh of of of transformed people. So let's talk a little bit about the the interubjective work. I think that's that's uh very important also to speak about because Andrew uh SA's interubjective breakthrough happened in the year 2001 and then in 2013 12 years after uh Enlighten next crashed and up to that point a lot of holonic work and uh evolutionary dialogue and enlightened communication as it was called at the beginning was happening in in the community and then we started again probably six years ago Apurva very very quickly when you joined then short after we started yeah probably five years ago uh mainly online because we didn't have so many retreats physical retreats so the main work was online when we started manifest nana our online asham and we restarted the whole ons and yeah probably good to describe a little bit how the the hollands evolved and what we what we experienced in the holonic work and also I can say for myself I felt deeply that the structures that were created to enable the holonic work and the interubjective work were right there when people had the right position or took the right approach to to access it. It's almost like it was there in the cloud and we needed the key and it to open the door and it was all right there, you know. Yes. And still is obviously. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For me, this was the first time I was uh part of something like this of course. So, it was very new for me initially. So uh I'm grateful to all the facilitators also patiently guiding cuz initially it was more like a positive egos coming and having a dialogue. Mhm. Um which was also good uh in the beginning and then I could just see because every time and then as we went deeper and deeper into it every year uh I feel they literally were structures like they like you described beautifully. I think it was like a structure already present and then when we were just following those simple deep instructions of deep listening and not already knowing and building each other so these pointers constantly being told to us and uh with sir's guidance of course in the every month I think we would meet in a holong with him. So all of this really created and built like a structure I would say a crucible as he described it. Yeah. So where it allowed us to explore into parts of consciousness and he he dared to lead it that that that was like you know he was the inspiration for us also like in that sense where he was guiding us into this completely unknown territory and and then the more we trusted the process and we gave in our all to it I could definitely feel the whole evolving and from personal it went into the impersonal and then I could feel it going into authentic elves meeting and having conversation about the nature of what was already like you said present like I mean and that was that that I mean in in meditation like we did a 4-day meditation retreat I remember online during covid and during that like I did have deep experiences uh very very deep experience again it's because of the grace of the guru cuz even in that I had that insight when I had the deep experience that this is only possible from the grave. So I was so ever grateful for that aspect of it. But it's only in the later years I realized how important this intersubjective dialogue is and how I would almost say it's it's a very sacred work. This is where we get to actually participate and uh help consciousness evolve through us through all these different structures and uh how beautifully he would always explain these different parts of ourselves and help us you know bring forth the authentic self constantly in these dialogues. So I I definitely feel the holons evolved and as you beautifully said like we were I think building this over the past mistakes. So we had we had an advantage. Yes, I can feel that especially after I heard all the recent talks I could feel that yes we had the amazing. So that itself again explains how the teaching evolved over these years and it was literally a living enlightenment and he was emboding it for us and paving the way for us to do the same. Yeah, I'm very new for this work. I never met it before and I would say in the beginning I was I I didn't get it. I thought I get it but um I I did not. And then a bit later something shifted and um yeah he said just a simple things Max it's how enlightened how enlightenment works and talks and for me it was a main instruction. And it's like and then after this I can see that these people sharing space of awakening this it's it's our group. It's like a transmission. It's it's it's not just a conversation. It's um it's a real thing. So when when enlightenment stands up from a cushion meditation cushion and goes to the world that's how it represent itself how how it looks like. Mhm. So yes and in the last retreat I asked him something and he said Max the consciousness delights itself in the self-recognition and it made a complete difference after this everything became to have this different quality this dial dialogues became like a Yeah, it's a very great powerful tool to to be focused on the energy which goes through you. This impulse which goes and if there is a bit of ego, it kind of makes everything. that when you like a channel for it, it it's Yeah. It's beautiful. And he mentions that we are on the evolutionary trail. Yeah. The leading edge. Yeah. Yeah. And I also realized with some in some of the conversations I had with former students that the interubjective work also significantly changed because one one person that I had a conversation with asked me of off camera are you still doing dialogue work? Uh and I said yeah of course and uh he said yeah and are you still giving feed so strong feedback to each other? and I was stopped in in in my track. I said, "No, that that's not our practice." And I found that very interesting how and and then I remembered that this was much more present uh in in enlightened X that you you had this conversations and when somebody was off uh he or she was corrected right away like with this feedback you come from ego you come from ego and I feel like what we what we really practiced in the last years was more like elevating the authentic self contributions so that the ego. I always feel like it's more like letting the ego fade out left and right and and just give acceleration to the authentic self. No, instead of addressing the ego and we all have a sense when there is a little bit too much ego, but you I think we learn to just not make it so relevant. just starve it a little bit on the side and and elevate everything that that comes from from the deepest place of ourselves. Yes. Yeah. That's so true. Yeah. The energy is such that uh even something something stuck and you have this simple instruction to to listen to to listen to listen to listen and this energy yeah as you said elevates you. It's kind of clear the the way. Mhm. And it's very easy to to be authentic to to to be this channel for something bigger. Yeah. When it works, it's almost like riding a wave. It doesn't need effort. You just Yeah. Ride the wave. Yeah. So, I also love to ask you uh is there any anecdotes or or funny stories or crazy stories or profound stories that you would like to share? Anything that that comes to mind? any experience you had with Andrew that you would like to share? Max, you want to go first? [Laughter] Yeah. So, the the first what I mean it's lots of things I can to tell. Yeah. But the first what came to my mind it's a so he had this heart operation. Yeah. on the open heart operation and like a couple of weeks after this I was invited to his place and he said, "Ma, Max, you want to see my scar?" And immediately he started to unbutton his short and kind of show me this this huge car going like a through all the chest. I was like and and then it's like I don't know something shifted and you know like a time stopped and the colors became brighter and I could see this glowing heart kind of wanting to burst out from his chest and it was like and I remember this thought like a it's a very good the doctors kind of tied him with this bondage otherwise it will fill you know all the room. Yeah. And then it's like that's the moment you know it's it's it's the moment and I I I don't know what and then I remember he's kind of button him up and kind of smile and wink at me and yeah that's that's the end of it. That's his way of yeah to make this humorous things and the the energies like you know like ah that's beautiful yeah and and and for me it was like uh it was just I mean for me it was every time like in the in the satsang he would just crack us up with jokes and his sense of humor I feel was very very good and uh at the same time uh you know it was just uh you know I mean in the last retreat what hit me really profoundly was I think after the surgery and all he had become quite weak but uh when he sat you know on the chair and he was doing what he was doing and I feel like I I There was this one day I think it was third day into the retreat. He was just glowing like I have never experienced anything like that before because he was just transmitting like transmitting the light and you know on the other hand I remember his just before when he walked in he was you know like a little weak and everything on the physical level but when he sat on that chair and that hit me very profoundly. I mean I for me I can I will never forget that that the whole retreat and how even though in the physical form he was not in his best shape but when he sat on the chair and it's it yeah even now I get tears he just gave his all his all to the teaching itself to consciousness itself and he was literally transmitting that I mean I that is not uh not human I feel sometimes like you know that is definitely not possible So that was really really really profound for me you know when he was able to do these things and and and at the same time there were so many times when we have spent time together and you know I will expect him to be strict and you know come from this high rope higher place and but he would just joke around and you know all the lunches we've had in Thiruan Nalai and he would we would listen to music he would show me all of these uh famous jazz musicians questions which I am not you know anywhere uh close to because I've never even listened to jazz all my life but so he was a I mean just to give you more context he was a drummer in his earlier life and I've also into drumming now so you know we had that bond and uh so yeah and also the way he would respond like you know every time he's so relevant with whatever he talks about like that that that every dialogue has he knew know what to say, the right thing to say. That always struck me like I was amazed at how he would just give me the right response and ask me the right questions and the conversations would just go more and more beautiful and even if it's not in the formal setup and even when it is the formal setup, he would give his 200% and he would really help us understand the whole whole thing and he was so patient. He was so patient like I told you right I've asked the same question to him in the six years in like 20 different forms in my defense each time I had an insight in a different way but I remember him lovingly saying oh purva but you have already asked me this like 20 times and I'm like yeah but that's okay I always got a you know new insight and he just laughed and yeah I mean it I loved him. I love him. Yeah, it was just a beautiful so many moments we had where there was just so light and you know Yeah. And when what you described how much he he still was capable and wanted to teach even when he got very weak after the retreat that that was even worth like he gave s until 28th of uh February. So that was three weeks, three weeks before he died. And he was so weak that I had to to hold him on two hands to bring him into the satsam room. And he had difficulty walking. And then he sat down on on that chair and took the first question, meditated first and then took the first question and he was right there. There was nothing missing up to the last satsum. Nothing. Not not a little bit. Not a little bit. The feeling of oh, Andrew is is weak and we can feel it in the sa. You could not feel it in a sa. That was amazing. No. True. Yes. True. It's amazing. Cuz even after that when he was in Bangalore, I did get to visit him. Oh yeah. You saw him there. You saw him a week. He was even more weak. Yeah. Yeah. But when I looked into his eyes, like you know there's that steadiness that never went away. And I mean I I was just thinking about that even after I came home. I'm like, "Wow, what a presence." Yeah. Yeah. It was amazing. Yeah. Yes. I He was a very disciplined man and um the way he he led his life, it was such an example. And I remember he he asked me to to establish to set up a bull bar in his house and he said in one month he was already very fra fragile and his body was big and he said in one month I will do this thing on this and he did. He was able to perform I mean what is not easy to perform. Yeah. Yeah. And I worked with him with his diet and some supplementations also. And during that time also I remember him telling Apurva I'm going to be your best uh client and all of that. Yeah. I mean he followed everything I said. Uh yeah. Uh he he he was like a living inspiration. Yeah, he really was. And he wanted he wanted to heal himself and like from Parkinson's and just to get strong again to to be Yeah. to be able to give to the world what he had to give. That that was the only thing that he was interested in. Literally the only thing. Yeah. And Yeah. Yeah, that's that that's just amazing like the dedication to a real body sa I always thought like that's that's how a real body sa looks like truly cuz I remember like I wanted him to postpone the surgery take another opinion and all but he was like the retreat is in Jan and I have to do it now I have to be this is more important than anything else so I I literally saw saw him give his body, mind, soul, everything to the teaching in real life. Yeah. Yeah. He was a was a real human and but the main thing he was a function. He it's it's such a it's it's not a human. It's a function. It's Yeah. Amazing dedication. An amazing focus. Yeah. [Music] Yeah. Is this a good place to end or would you like to add anything? I mean, I'm just grateful. Uh the loss was difficult initially and sudden and I spent the last few weeks just reminiscing all the memories because they seem to be etched in the mind and heart forever and that pain has turned into deep deep deep deep gratitude. uh and uh yeah I mean and continue the teachings living the teachings and uh I hope we can make him proud. Yes. Yeah. And continue. So yeah I'm grateful truly grateful. Yes. I Yes. I I feel him with me actually. I talk to him 10 times a day and I I kind of consult with him inside of me and he comes in my dreams and um I'm very grateful and I don't feel it's kind of it's the end. I feel it's u but in the same time the story we have I was among the these people who put him in the creation cremation file it's very strong experience and Um something big happened in that moment. I feel like we we kind of he lives here and it's very very beautiful. It's very beautiful. Lots of gratitude. Thank you so much both of you. That was delightful. Thank you. Thank you.